Friday, January 05, 2007

The French

Until I have a new idea for the new year, here's a brief rant from an email I sent in March last year about why I didn't like one of my friend's characterising the French as cowardly, stupid and incompetent (after all, the French have enough things about them to dislike, without making up more).

The context: Google Fight may or may not have had Nice Germans beating French Military Victories.

I don't know what Jim did, but I prefer the idea of there being more sites of "French military victories" than "nice Germans" as

a. The whole point of disliking the French is how close they always came to winning, requiring us to use our British qualities such as stiff upper lips, spunk, and clever physical comedy* and one liners** to overcome their superiority in chocolate, wine, food, cigarettes, attitude to statues of young women in the nude*** and hats. They were always a superior type of foreigner, unlike Italians, Spaniards, Turks etc. so beating them MEANT something. If they hadn't, for example, conquered most of Europe under Napoleon, Trafalgar, Waterloo, and the whole Peninsular War would have been meaningless, and in the wrong place.

b. I have met some nice Germans, but why would you put it on a website?

* "I really do not see the signal!" (Nelson, probably not putting the telescope to his blind eye)
** "Publish and be damned!" (Wellington, when Napoleon threatened to reveal the secrets of his bootmaker)
*** ie fine art

(Ironically, I've just posted about Nice Germans on this blog).