Thursday, December 10, 2015

Star Wars Pre-Reading

"What Star Wars products do I need to have consumed to understand the new film?" is a question that no one will ever ask me after I spent ten minutes explaining the plot of episode IV and realised I had not mentioned Darth Vader. Ah the trip to see the special edition of The Empire Strikes Back with someone who had not seen the original. So many happy memories.

Still, in case you are curious, here's what I recommend to get you up to speed for The Force Awakens.

1. Droids Cartoon Series.

It only lasted 13 episodes and didn't even have Kenny Baker as R2D2. Still this really gets to the heart of the position of droids in the Star Wars... oh who am I kidding.

2. Star Wars: Masters of Teräs Käsi fighting game.

Why is every character in the original trilogy all learning the same style of Kung Fu? Who cares, fight! Also has Leia in her slave outfit, officially the most modest clothing of any female character in a fighting game ever.

3. B4-D4 section of Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords

You're already ten hours into the game by now. Might as well do it! Hard mode: Lie in every conversation.

4. Splinter of the Mind's Eye

This novel was written as a sequel to the original Star Wars film with the possibility of making it into a low budget movie sequel. Instead it made a lot of money so George Lucas made up some other stuff.

5. The Glove of Darth Vader from The Glove of Darth Vader

Darth Vader's glove can deflect blaster bolts, but he can already do that with his force powers AND his lightsaber. Belt, braces and safety-pinned to his shirt! It's that kind of triple-checking and attention to detail that is his hallmark

Anyway, that should bring you up to speed. If after watching the film you still have questions then I can only point you in the direction of The Phantom Menace graphic novel after which your Star Wars curiosity will undoubtedly be satisfied.