Patreon Reward: More Lacey Lee

12 months ago I did not intend that my Patreon serial for this year would be Lacey Lee, Detective Extraordinaire*. When it came time to add a bonus for subscribers I wrote a Lacey Lee poem.

Thanks to the ongoing flow of time and the changing nature of plans this means that those of you following along on the blog will get a Lacey Lee story, a Lacey Lee poem and Lacey Lee liner notes this month. Good luck with that. There is a simple solution though; go to my Patreon site, subscribe, and get 12 months of non-Lacey Lee content ahead of general release.

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Lacey Lee Detective Extraordinary
A classified case we would not ordinarily
Be allowed to see
But between you and me

The breach in security will hardly
Be a threat with the incompetently
And stupidly acting criminals (no Moriartys).

A government laptop casually
Left on a bus travelling very slowly
Between Whitehall and Piccadilly.

It had not turned up where you’d usually
Expect to find some lost property.
When the report came it was Lacey Lee
Who was visiting the minister unrelatedly.

Her solution was not so elegantly
Designed as some. Yet comparatively
(The Police had visited several obviously
Dodgy shops of the electronic variety
And threatened them unambiguously)

A work of masterful integrity;
She posed as a buyer discreetly:
Laptops for schools for heart-of-gold cockneys;
Computers for terrorists to design WMDs
For those avaricious incorrigibly.

The laptop turned up amongst the stolen booty.
Lacey Lee gained contacts in the fencing fraternity.
And government secrets returned confidentially.
All wrapped up discreetly and neatly.

When you publish the story don’t tell them it was from me.



* It was going to be Team Zero, a darkly comic superhero epic. See this post for an explanation.

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