April Films Update 4

Ten films I watched in 2025. This leaves only one more to complete my film review of the year.

****

1. Karate Kid Legends

In a prologue in Okinawa (See The Karate Kid II) Mr Miyagi (Pat Morita) tells Daniel LaRusso (Ralph Macchio) the story of how an ancestor of his was shipwrecked in China, learned kung fu from the Han family, and returned to start his karate school. Thus like the bonsai tree he uses as a symbol, there are two branches of the martial arts school.

In the present Mr Han (Jackie Chan, see The Karate Kid (2010)) teaches kung fu in Beijing. His grand-nephew Li Fong (Ben Wang) is a student. His mother (Ming-Na Wen), a doctor, takes him away to New York where she has a job; also she wants him to stop studying martial arts after his brother was killed by an opponent after he won a tournament.

In New York Li meets Mia Valpani at the local pizza shop, which is run by her father Victor Valpani, once a boxing champion. He becomes friends with Mia, but her ex, Conor Day, at the same school, becomes weird about it. He’s a local karate champion* and punches Li. Struggling at school Li’s mother hires a tutor, Alan, so he has a second friend. Conor and Li have a confrontation at school and Li tries his brother’s signature move, the dragon kick, but Conor sees it coming and defeats him.

Despondent, Li spots some thugs trying to attack Victor and intervenes. It turns out Victor owes money to O’Shea, who also runs a karate dojo, the one Conor trains at. Victor returns to boxing to raise money and asks Li to train him. After some reluctance, and phoning Mr Han he agrees. At the comeback match O’Shea has his opponent use illegal blows to win the fight and send Victor to hospital. Li freezes, seeing his brother’s death again disappointing Mia; his mother is obviously at the hospital and is disappointed he’s doing martial arts again.

Mr Han arrives to try and bring him out of his depression. Between them they realise that Li needs to confront his fears in the only way possible; by fighting in the Five Boroughs tournament, which if he wins will also bring in enough money to pay off the debt. American karate tournaments are not Mr Han’s specialist subject so he goes to California to appeal to Daniel LaRusso for help. Initially Daniel doesn’t want to, then he comes for a long training sequence in Alan’s rooftop garden, which they turn into a dojo. Meanwhile Victor recovers and Li and Mia start dating.

Li starts to make his way through the tournament. His mother, seeing him do better is convinced that martial arts are good actually. They figure out a way to use the dragon kick in a way that will fool Conor. O’Shea sends thugs after Li, but Mr Han and Daniel beat them up. Inevitably Li fights Conor in the final.

This is quite packed for a Karate Kid film, more characters, the bustle of New York, the difference between the bickering comic relief mentors and the slightly cool teens. Making Li the trainer in the first part, his failure being unable to prevent harm due to cheating, that’s pretty good. (By now you’d think both Mr Han and Daniel would be wise to that sort of thing). In the end it’s Another Karate Kid. I haven’t seen Cobra Kai; if I had maybe I’d be tired of this sort of thing. But I haven’t, it's fine.

Watch This: More karate kid martial arts nonsense
Don’t Watch This: Kids fighting to resolve their problems

* Because of course he is 

2. American Gangster

In 1968 Frank Lucas (real, Denzel Washington) is the right hand man of Harlem gangster Bumpy Johnson. When Johnson dies of a heart attack Lucas takes over. Using contacts in the US military in South East Asia, he buys heroin from the producers, and has it smuggled over on military flights. The heroin is of better quality and cheaper than competing suppliers; his “blue magic” becomes dominant in New York and surrounding areas. He brings in his five brothers from South Carolina to act as lieutenants, buys a mansion for his mother, marries Eva, a beauty queen. Following Bumpy’s example he is generous to the people of Harlem and becomes a prominent local figure.

A little too prominent! At the Fight Of The Century (Joe Frasier vs Muhammad Ali, real) detective Richie Roberts (Russel Crowe, real) spots him amongst the audience, and notes that he has better seats than the Italian mobsters he’s there to surveil. Roberts, a detective in Newark, New Jersey, across the river from Harlem (on the island of Manhattan, New York) had discovered $1,000,000 in a mobster’s car and handed it in which made all the other cops worried he might turn them in if they stray outside the law. When President Nixon declares a war on drugs, Roberts is put in charge of a drugs task force leading him to Lucas.

Roberts has trouble getting anyone to be interested in Lucas. They’re focused on the mafia, and assume Lucas, a black man, must be working for them. Later the links to the military become a problem as no one wants to accuse them of drug smuggling. Meanwhile Lucas’s success causes problems; he’s in conflict with another black gangster Nicky Barnes; the mafia attempt to assassinate him; and corrupt New York detective Nick Trupo is always looking for more. Trupo does have some actual use, warning off Roberts when he’s operating in New York.

One of Lucas’s cousin’s shoots his girlfriend; Roberts is able to use this to get him to inform. When Saigon falls and the US military withdraws from south east Asia, Lucas arranges one last gigantic heroin shipment, in which it’s smuggled in coffins. Roberts finally manages to link Lucas to the drugs and arrests him.

It’s a fictionalised version of real American organised crime! Not The Godfather, but what is, it gives other films of the genre a run for their money. One thing to note is that Roberts’ marriage has fallen apart, and his career is already in difficulty before he hands over the $1,000,000. A minor theme is that he’s studying to qualify as a lawyer and also ends up in court due to his divorce. Meanwhile Lucas is a good family man, bringing in his family members, looking after his mother. He’s even a better husband until they try to assassinate his wife after which they come apart.

Watch This: Clever, exciting crime film
Don’t Watch This: Violent, bloody, often stupid

3. Castle Of The Living Dead (1964)

In France after Napoleon, there are bandits and deserters and all kinds of dangers. A troupe of actors doing commedia dell’arte do the thing where the Harlequin fools Bruno the hangman into hanging himself to the delight of the crowd. Afterwards the Harlequin storms off so they replace him with Eric; meanwhile they are invited up to the castle of Count Drago (Christopher Lee).

On the way they meet an old woman (Donald Sutherland) who warns them against going to the castle, and also a weird bird. In the castle Count Drago is revealed to be a keen taxidermist. He has a room full of lifelike stuffed birds, also has a odd-looking servant named Sandro. Drago seems very interested in Laura, the woman in the troupe. When they play the hanging scene there’s an accident; although they appeal to the police sergeant (also Donald Sutherland) there’s nothing to be done. Until Sandro starts chasing Laura and has to be rescued by Nick the dwarf.

The Count’s secret is fairly predictable with the title and the taxidermy; still it’s nicely horrible and Lee manages to go from suspiciously charming to full villainy in a pleasant way. The setting, a real castle in Italy, is good. The stunts are not so good, some in an entertaining way.

Watch This: Moderately interesting and creepy horror film
Don’t Watch This: Fairly slight, lots of running and screaming

4. Scandal (1989)

Dr Stephen Ward (John Hurt), an osteopath who moves in high society, spots Christine Keeler (Joann Walley-Kilmer) dancing in a club; he sets her up in a flat and takes her on as his protégé. When the Conservative Party win the election he invites a number of politicians and others to a sex party, which initially Keeler is taken aback by but then joins in.

Initially Christine is at odds with another dancer, Mandy Rice-Davies (Bridget Fonda), later the two become friends. When Mandy finds herself being thrown out by her landlady Christine convinces Lord Astor (Leslie Phillips) to go and collect her and pay off the landlady. Mandy and Christine move in together. Ward sends them to various friends and acquaintances, as escorts or call girls.

One of their clients is Soviet naval attache Eugene Ivanov. When this comes to the attention of Mr Woods, who is in British Intelligence, he asks Ward to report on this, as they believe Ivanov is a spy*. Ward invites Ivanov out to the country, where he has a cottage he rents from Lord Astor for a nominal fee possibly as a quid pro quo for Astor cheating at bridge. One evening after dinner Astor and his guests go over to see Ward, where they discover Christine dancing in the nude for Ward and Ivanov; she attempts to run away but is caught by Astor’s guest John Prufumo (Ian Mckellen), a senior government minister.

Christine begins affairs with both Ivanov and Profumo. After some time Profumo says he cannot be seen going to Ward’s flat, and they break up. When Ward sends Christine to buy marijuana she meets Jamaican gangster Lucky Gordon (Leon Herbert), who becomes obsessed with her. When he later finds she is also seeing a rival gangster (and jazz musician) Johnny Edgecombe (Roland Gift) he attacks them and Johnny fights back. Later Johnny arrives at Christine and Mandy’s flat, demanding Christine leave with him to avoid Lucky’s revenge; he breaks in and shoots a gun. Ward picks her up from the police station and insists Christine leave the flat to avoid scandal. Seeing her in tears a reporter (Keith Allen) gets the story out of her, and is surprised to hear Profumo, a rising star in the government, is involved.

Christine finds herself in every newspaper and sells her story. This forces Profumo to make a statement in parliament that his relationship with Christine had no impropriety. To try and get ahead of the situation the Conservative Party leader has the police investigate Ward and his friends. Ward sees this as harassment and threatens the police commissioner with revealing all he knows, but the police commissioner is unphased. Eventually Ward is put on trial for living off immoral earnings. Though Christine and Mandy claim they only paid Ward rent, he’s found guilty. During the trial the fact that Christine was having affairs with the British minister of war and a Soviet spy at the same time is revealed and Profumo is forced to resign. This is all based on real events and ends on a rather downbeat note with Ward’s suicide.

On the one hand this very much wants to exploit a real scandal with real people (many still alive at the time of release). On the other hand, it’s not really exaggerating, everything in here, sordid and otherwise, happened. Conservative Party members wanted to hang out at Ward’s parties, sleep with his beautiful young women. If there’s a flaw it’s that it compresses events, making the timing (this takes place over about four years) rather unclear.

Watch This: Engrossing and well made chronicle of the Profumo Affair
Don’t Watch This: Dirty old men get involved with young women, for once some actually pay a price for it

* Ivanov's Wikipedia article is titled Yevgeny Ivanov (spy)

5. What The Butler Saw (1950)

The Earl has spent some years abroad in the Coconut Islands* with his butler Bembridge on government business. Returning home to his stuffy English country house he discovers that the Princess Lapis has stowed away in his luggage. It seems she’s fallen in love with Bembridge.

Invited to the Earl’s homecoming banquet she shocks his family by turning up naked; as Bembridge explains in her country the more formal the occasion the less you wear. Some plot comes in; firstly her father the king thinks she’s been kidnapped and threatens to declare war on Britain. Secondly the cook, even more shocked by the goings on, writes to a newspaper’s agony aunt. They send a reporter, who arrives when Lapis is trying to slip Bembridge a love potion; as might be expected this goes astray and the Earl’s daughter falls in love with the reporter.

In the end everything comes right. This is very slight, the Earl being fun-loving, the butler competent and charming, and Lapis’s actress being chosen for looking good in a bare-legged, one shoulder leopard-skin costume. On the other hand she does a better job than the Earl’s relatives and other servants who mostly just stand around disapproving.

Watch This: Short, brisk, romantic comedy
Don’t Watch This: Very few good jokes and startling in it’s casual racism

* The Coconut Islands are in the South Seas, with plenty of alligators, crocodiles, leopards etc. Several characters suggest that there is cannibalism and voodoo practiced there. The king is warlike, raiding other islands. As will be seen the one Coconut Islander in the film does attempt to use magic; though it makes it clear that there’s no real malice here, it’s probably not actually an improvement that Mercy Haystead, who plays her, is white British.

6. The Scarecrows’ Wedding

Betty O’Barley is a scarecrow who works hard keeping the birds off the field. So hard that the farmer makes a second scarecrow Harry O’Hay. After some initial comedy the two realise they are literally made for each other and decide to get married, and hold “a wedding that no one will ever forget.”

To prepare for the wedding they make a list. But to get some of the flowers Betty wants takes Harry off the farm for the night, leaving Betty alone. Realising that she needs help on the big field, the farmer puts in a new scarecrow, a dashing, sharply dressed scarecrow called Reginald Rake. He attempts to flirt with Betty, but his efforts to impress her cause disaster.

This is a charming, rhyming animation for kids, based on a Julia Donaldson book, and in the style of many similar adaptions. If very slight, it’s still fun, and even has a moment of villainy followed by despair and then heroism. And of course it’s a comedy – it ends in a wedding.

Watch This: Fun kid’s short
Don’t Watch This: Nothing very much to it

7.  Mission Impossible – The Final Reckoning

At the end of Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One Ethan Hunt, a disavowed IMF agent, got hold of the cruciform key that allows access to the computer with the source code of The Entity, a malevolent Artificial Intelligence that has taken over the internet and most computer systems. Now the president gets a message to him begging him to turn over the key before The Entity takes over the world’s nuclear arsenals and presumably destroys the human race. Hunt refuses, as he has a different plan; his friend Luther Stickell, dying in his secret laboratory under London, is working on a “poison pill” device which, combined with the source code will defeat The Entity.

Meanwhile quite apart from attempting to take over the nuclear arsenals The Entity has used it’s power over the internet to create doomsday cults destabilising countries, and also creating new agents for itself, allowing it to slowly gain access even to offline facilities.

To find the details of when and where The Entity might be vulnerable they decide to track down Gabriel, once The Entity’s proxy, now discarded but wanting to get back in it’s good graces. The team of Ethan, Benji and Grace recruit Theo Degas, another IMF agent, and also Paris, once Gabriel’s assistant. Gabriel though turns the tables, captures Ethan and Grace, wanting to force them to go to the sunken Russian submarine Sevastopol, which has the source code module – which it turns out is the “rabbit’s foot” anti-god from Mission: Impossible III. With it he can control The Entity. They escape, and Ethan gets into a virtual reality module where The Entity shows him some scenes that haven’t happened in the film yet. Ethan gives his team the task of finding the Sevastopol, communicating the location to him, then arranging to pick him up (along with a decompression chamber etc – the entire plan requires ludicrously close and risky co-ordination and timing). Gabriel kills Luther and steals the poison pill device, following which Ethan is captured by the US authorities.

As more and more of the world’s nuclear arsenals fall to The Entity the president decides to trust Ethan, giving him a handwritten note and sends him out into the Pacific on a complicated journey to aircraft carrier, then on to a submarine, which is being hunted by a Russian submarine, while listening out for the co-ordinates*. Meanwhile his team get together their gear and head for a sonar listening station in the Bering Sea where there may be uncorrupted records from when the Sevastopol went down. It turns out the station is run by the guy who ran the unhackable computer than Ethan Hunt hacked back in Mission: Impossible, who got sent out here in disgrace, and there met his wife Tapeesa and made a new life for himself. However Russian special forces, also after the source code module, arrive and seize the base. The records are on an old disc which has no reader so the Russians insist they build a new one. They fight back, Grace and Tapeesa escaping on dog sled to rendezvous with Ethan while the others send the co-ordinates.

Following a quite extraordinary sequence where the submarine, perched on the edge of the continental shelf, becomes unstable, and also a doomsday assassin sent by The Entity is there, Ethan gets the source code module** and escapes; is rescued, decompressed and resuscitated. The rest of the team catch up and they go to South Africa to a doomsday vault The Entity intends to use to ride out the nuclear apocalypse. The president is left with the choice to unplug all the nuclear weapons or try a pre-emptive launch; she decides to unplug them, but due to doomsday assassins from The Entity in the American vault there’s a fight and The Entity gets control. In the South African vault Gabriel has set up a nuclear bomb. They reveal what the poison pill actually does; it diverts The Entity into a storage device that it will believe is the real server farm, a nice nod to the Mission: Impossible fake reality tactic. Anyway, it all comes down to one hundredth of a second, thieves’ hands, a biplane duel and avoiding a nuclear bomb going off.

So what have we got, as this brings to an end the Mission: Impossible series after 8 films and nearly 30 years. It’s got spectacular stunts, and some really good scenes. Occasionally the acting becomes good. There’s a lot of things going on, though usually only two at a time. The Entity, as the final boss of making a fake reality was tantalising in Dead Reckoning, here they mostly just work around it (paper messages, face to face meetings, things only they know etc). They just declare that Ethan Hunt is the pivot the world turns around, the man who can be trusted, but don’t actually say why. The Entity tries it’s best to get inside his head, fails, never explained, we never doubt Ethan or suspect he's been subverted by it’s vision. Anyway it’s over now, it was always rather silly, always looking to misdirect and then reveal. It told us that, and then just sort of did it one more time.

Watch This: Spectacular action finale to spy series
Don’t Watch This: Long, complex, has no answers, occasionally quite dark for no obvious reason

* A little bit Hunt For Red October, a little bit Crimson Tide!

** I think they call it the podkova but I’m already getting tired of all the bits and pieces

8. Countess Dracula (1971)

In 17^th century Hungary Countess Elisabeth Nádasdy (Ingrid Pitt) discovers she can regain her youth using the blood of young women in a ritual. She, her lover Captain Dobi, and her maid Julie seek out women who won’t be missed. The youthful Countess claims to be Elisabeth’s daughter Ilona, who has been away at school; when real Ilona returns Dobi kidnaps her and holds her in a hut in the woods.

Young, dashing Lieutenant Toth arrives, the son of a friend of the deceased count. Youthful Elisabeth-as-Ilona and he start an affair. However things go wrong when they kill Ziza, a prostitute, and she’s hardly rejuvenated at all. Dodi goes to the castle historian Grand Master Fabio, who finds him a book on blood sacrifices; this tells them they need virgins, so they buy a peasant girl in the village.

Fabio, suspicious, tries to warn Toth, but is killed by Dodi. Now-youthful Elisabeth wants to marry Toth to the annoyance of Dodi, who reveals the truth. Elisabeth forces Toth to marry her, but when Dodi brings Ilona to the castle for the final sacrifice, Julie, once her nursemaid, chooses instead to free her.

Loosely based on the real Elisabeth Bathory, with the Dracula name put on for marketing, this has everything you’d expect. Dark magic, boobs, secret tunnels etc. There’s just a bit of fear of aging going on, and of course an interrupted wedding for those who enjoy that.

Watch This: Solid period Hammer horror film
Don’t Watch This: Woman sacrifices other women to avoid aging, lots of blood

9. Sense And Sensibility (1995)

When Henry Dashwood dies the bulk of his estate goes to his son John (James Fleet) from his first marriage. His second wife and her three daughters Elinor (Emma Thompson), Marianne (Kate Winslet), and Margaret, are left £500 a year, though Henry also left instructions that John should look after them. John’s wife Fanny (Hariet Walter) talks him out of any large monetary settlement, and encourages them to leave the big house John has inherited. Margaret in particular is playing up, hiding and sulking. When Fanny’s brother Edward Ferrars (Hugh Grant) comes to stay he gets on with Margaret and in particular Elinor, which Fanny tries to put a stop to.

The Dashwood women are offered a cottage on the estate of the jovial Sir Henry Middleton (Robert Hardy), a cousin to Mrs Dashwood. Moving there they are frequent guests at his house Barton Park. As are others; Mrs Jennings Sir Henry’s mother-in-law; neighbour Colonel Brandon (Alan Rickman); the dashing John Willoughby. Marianne and Willoughby strike up a friendship, but when he asks to speak to her privately it’s not an engagement as everyone expects, he is called back to London.

New guests arrive, Mrs Jennings' daughter Mrs Palmer (Imelda Staunton) and her sardonic husband Mr Palmer (Hugh Laurie) along with their impoverished young friend Lucy Steele (Imogen Stubbs). Lucy and Elinor, of an age, become friends to the extent that she reveals she’s been secretly engaged to Edward Ferrars for several years; they cannot marry as his mother disapproves.

Mrs Jennings then takes the two elder Dashwood sisters and Lucy to London to stay with the Palmers. At a ball they encounter Willoughby who ignores them. He’s engaged to the wealthy Miss Grey. It’s revealed that Willoughby has been disinherited by his aunt. This is due to him getting Beth, Colonel Brandon’s ward, and illegitimate daughter of Brandon’s first love, pregnant.

Meanwhile Lucy and Edward’s engagement is revealed. Mrs Ferrars insists he break it off; when he refuses, he too is disinherited. On their way home Elinor and Marianne stay the night at the Palmers’ who live near Willoughby. Marianne goes to try and see him, is caught in the rain and falls ill, and is rescued by Colonel Brandon. Mr Palmer snaps into action, arranging everything for the Dashwoods, getting a good doctor. Marianne recovers and has fallen in love with Colonel Brandon.

They hear that Lucy is married and is now Mrs Ferrars. When Edward comes to visit they assume he’s married her but it turns out she threw him over and married his now rich brother. Free at last he proposes to Elinor for a happy ending (double wedding).

An adaption of the Jane Austen novel, stacked with talented actors – I noted Hugh Laurie as Mr Palmer, seeming to be a quiet bit of comic relief, but as it turns out one who can convey competence in a crisis. In fact that’s sort of my feelings about the whole film. Jane Austen’s works aren’t, strictly speaking, romances as we understand them, but are the major font that gave rise to the Regency Romance as a genre. This film gracefully accepts that, putting the romance story and the period trappings front and centre, while allowing the other parts, the comedy of manners, the social commentary, to appear in many scenes. I might wish for more, yet this is faithful enough.

Watch This: Superbly acted period drama
Don’t Watch This: Women hang around trying to arrange marriages

10. The Proposition

In 19^th century Australia the Burns gang are in a shoot out with police. There are two survivors, Charlie Burns (Guy Pearce) and his younger brother Mikey Burns. Police Captain Morris Stanley (Ray Winstone) offers Charlie the titular Proposition. He is to kill his older brother Arthur Burns, who is wanted for the rape and murder of Eliza Hopkins. If he doesn’t, Mikey will be executed at Christmas, which is in a week.

Charlie sets out. Some Aboriginal men in custody have seen Arthur, though they won’t go near his cave, calling him dog man. Morris’s wife Martha (Emily Watson) asks what happened to Eliza, her friend who was pregnant, and Morris hides the worst parts, and doesn’t mention The Proposition. The police sergeant and other police disapprove of letting Charlie go, following which they then return to their other topic of gossip; how attractive Martha is.

Charlie goes to a bar where he meets Jellon Lamb (John Hurt). The owner of the bar has been speared to death and Lamb is drunk; Charlies realises from his rambling he’s a bounty hunter after the Burns gang, and knocks him out. Traveling on he’s attacked by an Aboriginal who stabs him with a spear, before being shot and Charlie passing out.

Back in town the policemen have gossiped, and Martha notices everyone treating her differently. Eden Fletcher, the police commissioner who hired Morris to clean up the district, arrives and orders Mikey flogged for his part in the rape and murder. Morris objects; this spoils his deal (Mikey will probably die) and besides Mikey, the youngest, was only peripherally involved. Martha overhears what happened to her friend Eliza. Realising that the sergeant caused this Morris orders him and his men out into the outback to hunt down the Aborigines who killed the barkeeper.

Charlie wakes up in Arthur’s camp. Despite several chances he doesn’t kill Arthur, doesn’t tell Arthur about Mikey and The Proposition. Morris tries to stop the flogging; it goes ahead. The townspeople become uneasy as the flogging goes on, Martha faints, and eventually Morris stops it and throws the bloody whip at Eden who fires him. Mikey is fatally injured.

The sergeant and his men find the Aborigines and massacre them; sleeping afterwards Arthur and Two-Bob, an Aboriginal member of his gang, murder them in return though not before the sergeant informs Arthur Charlie has been sent to kill him. While they’re away Lamb enters Arthur’s camp and takes Charlie and the others prisoner. Arthur stabs him and Charlie shoots Lamb, putting him out of his misery. He finally tells Arthur about Mikey; the dress up in police uniforms for a jailbreak.

This inevitably leads to final, brutal confrontation between the Burns and the Stanleys, when Morris lets his guard down during Christmas dinner. The film is by turns grim, dusty, dreamy, confusing, confused and exciting. Morris’s Proposition is clearly flawed, yet no one else has any better ideas. The bushrangers are murderous rapists; the police coercive, racist and violent.

Watch This: Violent, stylish thriller with some moments that give an impression of the heat and dust
Don’t Watch This: Gruesome and murderous men do some gruesome and murderous things