I Watch Films: Carry On Henry

 

Carry On Henry

Claiming to be a secret history of Henry VIII*, Henry (Sid James) has one queen executed so he can marry Marie of Normandy (Joan Sims), cousin of the French King, and beget an heir. However she constantly eats garlic which puts him off, unable to consummate the marriage. Left alone with Henry’s equerry Sir Roger De Lodgerley (Charles Hawtrey) Marie is seduced and becomes pregnant.

Learning of this Henry has his flunkies attempt to arrange a divorce, torturing Sir Roger for a confession. The French ambassador, learning of the pregnancy, congratulates Henry offering 10,000 gold pieces as a present, so Henry changes his mind, sending Sir Roger back to be tortured*** to recant his confession. Henry now meets Bettina (Barbara Windsor) daughter of the Earl of Bristol**** and attempts to seduce her.

This goes through another couple of excruciating turns before we end with Henry’s flunkies on the chopping black. When Henry offers to let them off to help with the next divorce (he’s just met Catherine Howard) they call out “Carry On Executioner”. I don’t think the film’s quite that bad.

Watch This: Bawdy historical comedy
Don’t Watch This: Which is worse, the comedy or the history?

* A manuscript by William Cobbler, the film claims that it is known to be all Cobbler’s** from beginning to end

** Cobbler’s is Cockney rhyming slang meaning nonsense, or rubbish. It’s cobbler’s awl, meaning balls (testicles)

*** On the rack, he gets taller, that’s not a bad joke

**** Bristols, Bristol City, titty etc.