December Films Update 1

10 films I watched earlier this year

****

1. Last Video And Testament

Hammer House Of Mystery And Suspense

Victor Frankham is the head of Frankham International Electronics. He’s discovered on a video call with his international team, turning down a military contract. It’s the 80s so this is all very retro-futuristic.

He’s unhappy with his Financial Director Oliver Tobias who’s late to arrive (they’re in Windsor, he gets held up by the Guards Band marching down the street). Tobias, as it turns out is having an affair with Selena Frankham, Victor's significantly younger wife. As Victor wants to move Oliver out of the country to another role, they come up with a plan to remove Victor from his leadership role.

At home Victor has a special office, with screens, phones, a computer, fax machines etc; his house is also fitted with cameras. Victor also has a heart condition, and anxiety. He refuses to get surgery on his heart until he’s trapped in a lift (by Oliver and Selena, who want to make him retire). He finally takes his doctor’s advice and flies to New York for surgery.

However his cameras have caught Oliver and Selena smooching, so he sets up a trap for them. He fakes his death and sends a video tape with a codicil for his will. In it he says that if something goes wrong in the operation he will have himself frozen for twenty years, his money and business in a trust for that period, at which time he and his beloved wife will be the same age and hopefully he can be revived*.

This neatly traps Selena and Oliver; they can’t take over the company and get together for twenty years. Their attempts to get out of the situation entangles them more and more, with a suitably (1980s) high-tech finale when they incriminate themselves.

Watch This: Entertaining 80s technology crime thriller
Don’t Watch This: Bad people do bad things have a bad revenge taken out on them

* Very optimistic about the advances in cryogenics between 1984 and 2004.

2. The Razor’s Edge

Larry Darrell leaves Illinois to volunteer as an ambulance driver in WW1. It’s much tougher and less noble than they all thought. Their leader Piedmont makes them carry pistols because the Germans will shoot them anyway, even though they’re non-combatants, and breaks the headlights to prevent them giving themselves away. Piedmont saves Larry at the cost of his own life.

Returning from the war he can’t settle, turning down a job as a stockbroker with his friend Gray Maturin at Gray’s father’s firm, and putting off his marriage with his fiancée Isabel. Isabel’s uncle Elliott Templeton suggests he go back to Paris, on the finest liners and the best society, staying with Elliott. Instead he works his passage and gets a job as a fish packer. After six months, and partly inspired by her friend Sophie who is married and has a son though they’re kind of poor, she goes to Paris and they break off the engagement, Larry still unable to find any meaning in life.

Larry goes on to work in a coal mine, saves another miner. They discuss books, and the miner suggests a couple of mystics for Larry to check out on the meaning of life. He heads for India, joins a Buddhist temple. There he finds some sense of peace and the abbot drops the quote from which the title came. “The path to salvation is as narrow and difficult to work as a Razor’s Edge.”

Back in Paris ten years have gone by, Isobel married Gray, they had two children, the Great Depression ruined them causing Gray’s father to commit suicide. They’re living with a now dying Elliott, whose aristocratic friends have deserted him. Sophie’s husband and child were killed in a car crash, she’s also in Paris, an alcoholic opium-addicted prostitute.

Larry gets Sophie back on the straight and narrow, and they get engaged. Isobel, in a moment of jealousy, tells Sophie she’ll be a burden on Larry, and leaves her with a bottle of booze. She relapses; Larry is beaten up when he goes after her and she dies.

Larry goes to confront Isobel, but discovers Elliott is on his deathbed. He lies about an invitation coming, that his friends haven’t all deserted him. Then Larry and Isobel admit how they loved and failed each other then Larry leaves.

Larry’s played by Bill Murray who was very keen to have this as a serious dramatic role, so much so that he agreed to star in Ghostbusters to get it made. It’s based on a Somerset Maughn novel. It doesn’t quite work, Larry trying to make sense of the absurd tragedy of the world by refusing to do what’s expected, or easy. The calm, almost passive, traumatised veteran goes to an even calmer monastery to find peace, and goes from letting the world get on with things without him to trying to quietly save a friend. It somehow lacks bite. Occasionally charming and some good scenes in the war.

Watch This: Interesting period drama with Murray attempting a dramatic role and some meditation on dealing with trauma and loss
Don’t Watch This: Meandering, dreamy, fails to give a good outline of either the problems or the attempted solutions

3. Night Of The Ghouls

1950s psychic personality Crisswell emerges from a coffin to blame events on juvenile delinquency, then a teenage boy and a girl drive out to the woods to make out; he gets too fresh and she walks off, the two of them are then killed by the mysterious black ghost.

At the police station* Detective Bradford arrives dressed for the opera; Inspector Robbins tells him he can investigate the old house at Willow Lake and still make the opera. An old couple met a white ghost out there and they think this might have something to do with the murdered teenagers. Bradford has history with the house (See Bride Of The Monster, review forthcoming) so goes out there with comic relief police officer Kelton (also in Bride Of The Monster and also Plan 9 From Outer Space).

Arriving there he encounters Dr Acula, a turban-wearing man who assumes he’s a new client. Dr Acula can contact the dead, and there is a table of people there to talk to them, and sitting opposite some skeletons. Also in the house is Lobo, a huge disfigured creature. While some dubious seanceing is going on, Kelton encounters both the black ghost and the white ghost.

Dr Acula is actually a fraud named Karl running a scam. The white ghost is an actress named Sheila. The black ghost is a real ghost and other dead actually rise. This all gets rather confused.

A low budget horror with some fun ideas that falls down with the appalling writing and odd scenes that go nowhere with inexplicable voice overs. The police can’t get to the point in any of their conversations and Bradford’s investigation makes no sense. The attempts to tie it back to a previous film is amusing but, as it turns out, it refers to events that I think didn’t take place.

Watch This: Edward Wood Junior brings his usual manic imagination to an often entertaining film, even if not always in the way intended
Don’t Watch This: Confusing, confused, poorly paced, strangely plotted and lacking in tension

* The station uses the East Los Angeles Sherriff’s department sign as an establishing shot, though the police appear to the City of Los Angeles Police Department as much as can be made out from ranks and insignia. This film is not as sensitive to the actual policing jurisdictions of the Greater Los Angeles area as some modern TV shows that are concerned with verisimilitude.

4. Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa

Several animals from New York Central Park Zoo have ended up on Madagascar (see, presumably, Madagascar). They now leave on a plane rebuilt by the comic relief penguins; on board are Alex, a lion, Marty, a zebra, Melman, a giraffe, and Gloria, a hippopotamus, the main characters, also Phil and Mason, chimpanzees, and King Julien, Maurice and Mort, various lemurs. The plane crashes in Africa; while the penguins attempt to repair it the other characters stumble onto a game reserve from which Alex was taken many years ago.

Alex discovers his father is the alpha lion and finds his family. Marty discovers the endless herds of zebras, all alike and fits in for once. Melman, hypochondriac, becomes the giraffes doctor, an alternative to the dying hole. Gloria is romanced by the other hippos.

Meanwhile the penguins and chimps are finding spare parts for their plane; they hold up a safari tour group from New York to steal their vehicles. The New Yorkers build a new society in the forest, led by the indomitable old woman who seems to be the animals’ New York nemesis. Eventually they build a dam which cuts the water supply to the reserve.

Before that though Alex has to go through the lion rite of passage. His father’s rival Makunga tricks him, making him think it’s a talent show (Alex is New York’s famous dancing lion) but it’s a fight and he’s tricked again into picking the biggest lion. He loses, his father won’t exile him so he steps down as alpha lion.

The other three main characters all have personal problems as well, and when the water hole dries up they have to work together. It’s a bunch of cartoon animals having zany adventures and realising that what’s really important is their friendship.

Watch This: Heartwarming kids animal cartoon comedy
Don’t Watch This: Lot’s of oddness, violence and betrayal by the comedy side characters

5. Jericho Ridge

Jericho Ridge is a rural sheriff’s station in the Pacific North West of the United States. Tabby Temple is a deputy, formerly chief deputy but she got in trouble getting Monty her teenage son out of trouble. She’s got a broken leg, so she’s working the phones on the night shift. She’s brought him in to work to keep him out of trouble.

The sheriff has his own trouble. Someone broke into the station last night and stole all the 9mm Glocks – but not the bigger guns. Facing election imminently – from a Stetson-wearing, gun-toting good ol’ boy – he wants to get them back quietly. They follow some leads, while Tabby watches from her desk. Cameras and phones play a big part, the sheriff station’s cameras got upgraded, but they’re hidden which was a screw up, as part of the point is deterrence

Between phone calls, arguments, how everyone has screwed up in one way or other, and video, often from the sheriff department’s vehicles, a picture of what’s going on emerges. And it’s always wrong, there’s always a new twist. Inevitably the limping Tabby, without her Glock, find herself under attack. Almost every piece gets turned around to reappear later. Do you want a violent thriller with a siege, the claustrophobia and plot enhanced by visuals through a camera? This works really well as one.

Watch This: Police siege that uses the characters relationships, community and technology to tell it’s story
Don’t Watch This: People trapped while bloody violence goes on is not for you
Interestingly: Though set in the United States, this is a British film with a majority British cast, filmed in Kosovo

6. Event Horizon

The Lewis And Clark space ship is sent on a deep space rescue mission in orbit around Neptune. It’s further out than any successful rescue has been done and it’s classified. As well as the regular crew (Lawrence Fishburne, Sean Pertwee etc) they have Dr Weir (Sam Neill).

Dr Weir was the designer of the ship, the Event Horizon. Designed to travel faster than light, it vanished seven years ago. Now it’s back and there’s been a weird and scary transmission that includes a Latin phrase they translate as “Save me.”

Initially appearing abandoned and dipping into the atmosphere of Neptune they board to investigate. The gravity chamber appears weird and evil. The records are incomplete and odd. People got killed here.

Faster than light travel breaks cause and effect, turns reality to madness. The film takes hold of that idea and turns it to dark hellish ends. Taking inspiration from Alien, and Hellraiser, and satanic imagery, it manages to create dread and terror though it does frankly, get rather silly with it.

Watch This: Spooky space story with some good actors raising the tension
Don’t Watch This: Crucifix shaped ship returns from hell

7. Parallel (2024)

Vanessa (Danielle Deadwyler) her husband Alex (Aldis Hodge) and brother-in-law Martel (Edwin Hodge) are at a house out in the woods. They’re considering selling the house, which has been in the family for some times. Vanessa is grieving – they’re all grieving – over the death of Vanessa and Alex’s child. She was killed in a car accident and Vanessa feels guilty.

Out in the woods is an old research facility. Rather than confront the issues Alex wants her to, Vanessa goes into the woods, through the hole in the fence. Things get strange out there. She finds herself at the same spot again and again.

She gets back to the house but it’s different, there’s a different Alex, there’s a different series of events that took place, though the child still died. When she runs away into the woods she meets another Alex, one who studied physics, rather than hers who became a high school science teacher. He’s got a plan to try and find his way back home. Or at least to a house he can live with.

But if there’s already an Alex or a Vanessa there, how will they deal with it?

Watch This: Spooky science fiction horror about grieving, choices and paths not chosen
Don’t Watch This: A lot of hanging around in the woods not sure what to do or where to go, do you get it

8. Concrete Utopia

In Seoul, South Korea, a giant earthquake rocks the city. One residential tower block, Imperial Palace Apartments, stays standing. Every other building falls, or is destroyed or buried or falls into the ground. Amongst the inhabitants are Min-sung, a civil servant, and his nurse wife Myeong-hwa.

People come for shelter, though power, water, heat and food are limited. When a fire breaks out Yeong-tak takes charge to put it out. The residents are unhappy with all the strangers coming in, so they decide to evict them, putting Yeong-tak in charge. They throw them out into the wasteland, put up fences. Min-Sung is put in charge of their militia, and they send out scavenging parties.

However some non-residents are still in the building, hidden by friends. The residents turn paranoid, Yeong-tak becoming more and more tyrannical. And everyone has secrets and lies to protect.

A biting dystopian film about parochial obsessions and how they can turn vicious. It’s possible there’s some pointed Korean commentary I’m missing, due to be being terribly ignorant of the country. Even without that it has much to say, while also offering a compelling vision of a wrecked city.

Watch This: Pessimistic disaster film with something to say about refugees and exploitation
Don’t Watch This: Pessimistic disaster film with something to say about refugees and exploitation

9. And Then There Were None (1945)

Eight strangers are invited to the remote Indian island off the shore of Devon, the mysterious U N Owen being their host. He’s not there and it turns out none of them have met him, nor have the two members of staff. There’s a strange and rather creepy rhyme about ten little Indians and how they die, until at the end “…then there were none.” Also ten Indian statues on the table. U N Owen is nowhere to be seen.

At dinner a mysterious voice accuses all of them of committing crimes; it was a record that the manservant put on, on instructions. Several of them deny their crimes; one admits it, then dies of poison.

As is ordained by the classic novel, death then stalks the rest of them, more or less referencing the rhyme and more or less poetic justice for their crime. For some reason the film tries to maintain a light tone, which goes poorly with the increasing paranoia and desperation of the guests. For those of you in the know, this follows the play rather than the book.

Watch This: The first filmed version of the classic mystery novel, a dark look at guilt and death
Don’t Watch This: Gets a bit silly at times

10. John Wick

In the outskirts of New York City, John Wick (Keanu Reeves) lives alone, his wife having died of cancer. From beyond the grave she sends him a dog as a companion; along with his classic car these are the ways he tries to find his way back from grief. Iosef Tarasov spots the car, decides to steal it, beating up John and killing the dog.

It turns out that John Wick was a legendary hitman and underworld enforcer. He worked for Viggo Tarasov, Iosef’s father. His brutal work made Viggo head of the Russian mafia and got him the nickname Baba Yaga, which they translate as the bogeyman for some reason. Then, falling in love with his future wife he asked Viggo to release him; Viggo gave him an impossible task which he completed. John digs up his stash, which includes weapons and gold coins, and going to the nearest illegal chop shop for cars, learns who took his car and goes on a roaring rampage of revenge.

As well as extraordinary fight choreography and Reeves almost silent portrayal of a man whose grief has possessed him as rage*, there’s a secret underworld society. This involves the Continental Hotel, a place where criminals etc can stay peacefully (more than one character breaks the truce) as well as being connected to the switchboard/archive of tattooed women who process and alert people to bounties. It’s also involved with the gold coins, the value of which is for things that aren’t available for money, perhaps. The point is this: this is not a simple revenge story, it is a mythic quest for vengeance in a secret world of debts, rules and violence.

Watch This: Excellent action revenge film
Don’t Watch This: Sad man has his dog killed, which is unbearable, then goes on to murder a lot of people

* Slightly undercut when he puts it into words when confronting Viggo, though at least it’s not long or too trite with it.