I Read Books: Short Stories by Ernest Bramah
This book, dated 1929, can be split into three sections. The first is made up of tales of Kai Lung; Kai Lung is a fictional Chinese storyteller and in Kai Lung books he has various adventures, each of which involve him telling a story. Here we just get the story without the framing narrative. To get an idea of what these stories are like here’s an excerpt:
In the reign of the Emperor K'ong there lived at Ho Chow an official named Thang-li, whose degree was that of Chief Examiner of Literary Competitions for the district. He had an only daughter, Fa Fei, whose mind was so liberally stored with graceful accomplishments as to give rise to the saying that to be in her presence was more refreshing than to sit in a garden of perfumes listening to the wisdom of seven elderly philosophers, while her glossy floating hair, skin of crystal lustre, crescent nails and feet smaller and more symmetrical than an opening lotus made her the most beautiful creature in all Ho Chow. Possessing no son, and maintaining an open contempt towards all his nearer relations, it had become a habit for Thang-li to converse with his daughter almost on terms of equality, so that she was not surprised on one occasion, when, calling her into his presence, he graciously commanded her to express herself freely on whatever subject seemed most important in her mind.
"The Great Middle Kingdom in which we live is not only inhabited by the most enlightened, humane and courteous-minded race, but is itself fittingly the central and most desirable point of the Universe, surrounded by other less favoured countries peopled by races of pig-tailless men and large-footed women, all destitute of refined intelligence," replied Fa Fei modestly. "The sublime Emperor is of all persons the wisest, purest and--"
"Undoubtedly," interrupted Thang-li. "These truths are of gem-like brilliance, and the ears of a patriotic subject can never be closed to the beauty and music of their ceaseless repetition. Yet between father and daughter in the security of an inner chamber there not unnaturally arise topics of more engrossing interest. For example, now that you are of a marriageable age, have your eyes turned in the direction of any particular suitor?"
"Oh, thrice-venerated sire!" exclaimed Fa Fei, looking vainly round for some attainable object behind which to conceal her honourable confusion, "should the thoughts of a maiden dwell definitely on a matter of such delicate consequence?"
They all talk like that, with unimpeachable politeness, even when lying, extorting or threatening each other. If that intrigues you I cannot recommend too highly; if not then don’t open a Kai Lung book.
The second set of stories concern Max Carrados, Bramah’s blind detective. His blindness rarely inconveniences; occasionally he fools people into thinking he’s sighted. Carrados in these tales find himself quite involved with matters of national security, including German agents at the outset of World War I and Fenian terrorists.
There are four other stories unrelated to either character, three rather silly, one an excellent tale of an extended fraud.
Read This: Because these sound interesting and this happens to be the Ernest Bramah volume you have to hand.
Don’t Read This: If this sounds terrible or you have access to the collections these were extracted from.
Also: The binding is coming off as might be expected for a 90 year old book. Inside, the card cover appears to have been recycled from a bicycle part catalogue.
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